How do I change him back?

You always assume that things get better for the princess when the frog turns into a prince, but now she's wondering if there's some kind of binding contract in that kiss. I spy that the frog prince wears glasses.

Mike Tyson's Punch-Out

Remember Mike Tyson's Punch-Out? It was super difficult to beat these guys, until you figured out how. Then it was super easy. They all had their weaknesses, and as soon as you figured them out then you could beat everyone including Tyson himself. This guy made a great expression when you hit him in the stomache (not pictured here).

Imaginary Friend

I created this for a Toon Club topic of "Imaginary Friends". What better imaginary friend can a person have than one that comforts you in time of need... by giving you endless supplies of money, pizza, satellite TV, popcorn, soda, and gummy lifesavers... all while flying you wherever you want to go?

Epic Battle

Such a waste. Preparing for battle... getting all buff... learning your skills. Then Caesar puts you up against his nephew. What to do?

Scary Beyond All Reason

Yzma is a scary, scary looking villain. It's good that she's probably not the most successful villain, but she sure is scary looking. I'm not sure if scary is the right word. Maybe less scary, and more nasty. She's a nasty looking villain. Somehow she manages to be hideous and beautiful at the same time. You can't look away, and yet you don't want to get near her or touch anything that she's touched. Wow. Yuck. Yikes.

Tortoise 2030

Be nice to the nerds, jocks. If you don't make it to the pros, hare, you're going to be working for the tortoise, who's wife very well may be hotter than yours.

Little Oysters...

"Little Oysters... Little Oysters...", but answer there came none. EXCEPT ONE!!

Methinks the Walrus and the Carpenter will think twice about tricking the oysters in the future, now that they have received Jedi training.

The time has come, my little friend, to think of running away from that oyster with the light sabers.

10 Lords-A-Leaping

I'm not sure what this has to do with Christmas. I think it makes a crappy and disturbing present for the 10th day as well, but whatever suits your fancy. Am I right?

Sea World

They had to double up on the protective glass for this exhibit.

It's nice to be back. I've been gone from the blog world for a while, and as I'm out of practice I felt it necessary to add a little fat to the lovely mermaid. The thing about fat is that it's unpredictable, and therefore much easier to draw than hotness. If you draw something on a hot mermaid where it doesn't belong then the reaction is, "that mermaid is totally not hot." If you draw a little fat where it shouldn't be, it still looks good, because who's to say that it doesn't belong there.

Tomato Juice?

Keep this QUIET, but you and I both know it tastes exactly the same, right? Makes you wonder what the "V" actually stands for, doesn't it?

Does that make it wrong that I like V8?

Do you think he uses his teeth to open it... or his nose? Ears? Eyebrows? So many options.

Lonely At The Top

Merlin, the original Manwitch takes another peaceful stroll through the clouds. It would be more peaceful if it weren't for the incredibly uncomfortable seating.

How's this for a makeover?

If I ever CHANGE I don't want it to involve me dying and then parts of me being put back together into a freak monster.

No offense, big guy.

Are Our Schools Safe?

"Joey, come see me after class."

I think the teachers have gotten a little too hands-on with their sex education.

Careful on the People Bars!

People bars! Get it? A little PLAY ON WORDS! Ha ha ha... good times.

People bars...

This is my newest submission to Toon Club and Illustration Friday.

Be SAFE you MONKEY kids!

Froggy Went A-Courtin'

This is my second ToonClub topic. Look how happy my blog is now! Happy pictures, happy yellow ties. I got rid of my angry rants, because they were probably bummin' everybody out.

In case you're wondering what's holding his tie on... it's a clip-on.

I haven't drawn much since high school, and it feels good. It feels right... this relationship I have with drawing. I think I'll go on a date with it.

This R.O.U.S didn't make the film.

Well, I'm a member of Toon Club now. It was either my fabulous drawings that got me in, or the fact that my bro-in-law feels bad for me, and is one of the original members.

Either way that makes me better than you, unless you happen to be a senior member of Toon Club, to which I say... "yes, sir, anything you say sir."

What you see here is a much more agile ROUS, a real fighter (in a Michael Jackson "Beat It" kind of way), coming to the rescue of his buddy, unfortunately he was unable to help as just off camera he jumped into a fire spurt and was gobbled up by lightning sand.

This Week's ToonClub Subject

ToonClub is a cool blog. I thought I'd try this week's subject myself, as Princess Bride is one of my favorite movies. Kind of a sad attempt. I need to refamiliarize myself with Photoshop... and drawing for that matter. It was tough picking a scene from this movie, as there are so many favorite scenes.

"Anybody want a peanut?"

Valentines Day vs. Halloween

Which holiday truly brings terror to the heart of men?

Men can't gain points on Valentines Day, we can only stay even. You give your wife/girlfriend ("the boss") a solitary flower on any other of the 364 days of the year, and you're considered a great husband/boyfriend ("handyman"), so thoughtful, and romantic. Multiplying the effort times 6 on Valentines Day will leave the boss wanting. 6 flowers and a card may get a handyman by with the boss, but that card better have some quality prose. A handyman should be safe with a dozen roses, a few balloons, and a very personal card. Don't forget dinner, and some intimate time together (talking of course, physical won't get you any points). $200 later and you're safe. You may want to invest in a random rose on some of those other days. Perhaps it could increase your odds of staying even next year.

I know the rules, so I've had nothing but positive experiences. However, I warn you, it takes many Valentines Days to make up for one. After all, we lose points at a much greater rate than we gain them.

I count myself lucky that my own personal views on this matter make the boss laugh. I'm a lucky handyman.